Beer

Been a while since I went beer hunting or indeed "ticking" for that matter.

A "ticker" for those that don't know, isthe closest thing the world of beer gets to a train spotter or anorak.  Tickers drink beer for the benefit of having put a tick beside that beer and adding it to their ticked list.  I've seen tickers at beer festivals having a single sip, yes just one sip of a fresh glass of beer and then getting out their rucksack, funnel and plastic bottle and promptly decanting the foamy brew, and labelling the new plastic bottle before stashing it back in their knapsack of destruction for consumption at a later date.

It's a dog drink dog world!

Me?  I like beer.... I LOVE beer.... my only problem is that I HATE being drunk.... it's a real quandry.

So, for a change, today, we visited The Nook in Holmfirth (land of a million Summer Wine tours) for their "Madchester Spring Beer Festival" - and yes, rather obscurely for a Yorkshire pub, their main selection of beers on offer were sourced from Manchester and its surrounding districts.  The exception to the rule being the beers from The Nook's own brewery.

I tried a chilli beer, a chocolate cherry stout, a pale blonde ale, a brace of golden ales, a black stout, and a dark ruby beer.... a really nice variety of flavours, aromas, colours and strengths.  A Saturday afternoon treat.

I didn't tick any beers, I didn't make a single tasting note on the supplied beer information sheet, I didn't decant any beer to bring home with me.... I emptied each glass before venturing on to the next level.

so now you know....  beer is good... there's a lot of variety, you don't NEED to stick with mass produced alcoholic drinks..... and you can take your dog to the pub with you!

I should also mention - I think it's only fair and prudent - that it was ME who put "Remember You're a Womble" on the jukebox!!  Sorry, but, to the woman who sang the song the whole way through, I have to say I knew someone other than just me would appreciate it.

When  you drink beers of this variety and quality, it's fair to say that Britain really HAS got talent!!

It's a yes from me!

Stretch.

After the long walk I went on yesterday it's been difficult to muster any enthusiasm to do very much at all today.  I even managed a little lie-in until 9:15am which was nice!

At the point where I sat down to watch a little bit of TV and subsequently got cramp in my legs, I decided it was time to go and have a little walk and try to stretch out those aching muscles.

Spent the rest of the day searching for a variety of containers in various locations and am pleased to now state that I've managed to clear the three most troublesome caches that I've encountered in my local area.  All great locations and all quite tricky.

One of them was a tiny magnetic box stashed in a speed limit signpost.... one was a 1 litre tupperware box stashed in and amongst a bunch of rocks at a quarry..... and the final one was a 35mm film canister stuffed inot the base of a tree and covered over with a rock.  Funny old game!

The only "outstanding" item of geocaching activity left on my "to do" list is this bloody trackable item that is attempting to journey around all the cricket grounds..... so far it's only been pictured at Old Trafford and I'd dearly like to get a picture of it outside Headingley, but it hardly seems worth the journey for the small amount of geocaching kudos it might generate.

Anyone going anywhere near Headingley in the not-too-distant future?

On the plus side, I've spotted my first wild garlic flowers and bluebells in the woods today.

Feeling the heat....

A long day in the saddle today... we walked around Rishworth Moor, which, when you put it like that, doesn't sound like much.... but boy, was it hard going?

A brief summary:  11.2 miles with 1573 feet of ascent.

We started above Baitings reservoir and climbed the sharp steep section up to Blackwood Edge.  We followed along Blackwood Edge Road (which is actually just a ridge path) past Dog hill and Joiner Stones.  We then made a slight balls -up when the GPS threw a wobbly and we ended up "yomping" across open moorland to reach Oxygrains Old Bridge before clambering back up the clough to Green Withens Reservoir by just after lunch time.

Rounding the reservoir we picked up a geocache at Hanging Rocks and another one a bit further along the track.  Then it was on to meet the M62 at the spookily named Lads Grave - litter, noise and pools of stagnant water typify this section until we meet the Pennine Way and a stunning footbridge that spanned the M62 at Windy Hill.

We turn with our back to the M62 and head uphill along the Pennine Way reaching Robin Hood's Bed and Blackstone Edge - Both truly stunning millstone grit outcrops with far reaching views across Littleborough and Oldham across fields of tumbling boulders - awe inspiring and a real contrast to the depressing M62 meeting.  We drop down off the Edge and join a packhorse route at the 600 year old standing stone Aiggin Stone.

Along this packhorse route heading towards Baitings Reservoir again and it feels like the home straight, but it's an optical illusion (with 3 miles left to go).  We meet up with the Rishworth Drain and turn right towards Flint Hill.  I think this is where Richard sank in a peat bog and he was actually starting to get drawn in!!  We contour around Warm Withens Hill and start the final weary descent down Cat Moss and back to the car.

We are ALL (dogs included) shattered after a harsh day in the heat amongst sun bleached, tinder dry grasses and heathers - tired eyes, tired feet etc etc.  Fantastic walk though.

See also:  Flickr photo set for today!

geo-nut!

I'm turning into a geo-nut.

Been out hunting geocaches again today.  Sought five and found only three.... one of the ones I didn't find is actually starting to drive me Miss Daisy!

So, you're unfamiliar with the geocaching thing?  It's like following a treasure hunt, with no map, and usually no treasure at the end of it all.  Still interested?  Read on MacDuff!

You will need....  one GPS enabled device (I use my mobile phone) with a piece of software called "Viewranger"; One account on Geocaching ; Several crappy plastic things; and Ikea pencils!; Optional - A pencil sharpener or penknife!

So you head over to Geocaching website and set your account up.... you look the the maps of where you want to go for a walk and see what caches are located in the vicinity and you input the co-ordinates to your GPS enabled device (I use my mobile phone).

Then you go for a walk, using your GPS enabled device (I use my mobile phone) to home in on the co-ordinates you've picked out.

You reach the right area and turn over a few stones, get stung by a few nettles, scratch your head, have a drink, get ready to leave then at the last minute stumble on the correct location and get hold of the cache.... note this is caCHE which is in no way related to caSH!!

Note:  Before digging out the cache - please ensure you are not seen by "muggles" - the non-geocaching community!

Usually the cache is a Tupperware box with a book, a blunt Ikea pencil, and some *crappy plastic toys in it.... half of the time it will be waterlogged.  You laugh at how silly this all seems... You sign the (usually) soggy log-book to say what fun you've had, put everything back in the container and stash it back wherever you found it..... and continue on your walk! 

*If you want to keep any of the plastic crap in there you must replace it with item of similar or greater value!

Whe n you get home you simply update the website to say if you did or didn't find the cache.

It's free - it's harmless, it's global and it's a good way of enhancing any walk.

As my old meerkat friend would say "squeak squeak" because meerkats actually can't talk

My latest Flickr set is here!.

And now you want to bust my balls?

What a scorcher of a day!

It's not even the end of March and once again spring has become this season's summer.  To sunny to take photographs, too hot to go walking, and fishing?  Well according to my "fishing weather" website the "bite" forecast is "terrible" and it was never that bad when the ponds were frozen solid.  It's a write-off.

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind a bit of sunshine.  I can potter round me garden, water me fruit trees, turn the compost in my wormery over.... no end of diversions to be enjoyed at a leisurely pace with a cold glass of pop, but today is different.... today I have an appointment.... a "revised" appointment that replaces the appointment I managed to miss last week.... with my osteopath!!  Time to get snapped, cracking and popped.

She's a lovely lady my osteopath - She's polish, short of stature, but immensely powerful.  She throws me round the room and jumps on me in ways that would see any other lady thrown across the room with the sheer recoil from my gargantuan frame!  Not so for Agnieszka.  Over a period of a few months she has rendered my spine as supple as a rattlesnake.

Whilst manipulating my skeleton we chat about this and that - it's usually a diversionary tactic on her behalf so you don't tense up at those crucial moments.  We talk about websites, about Poland, about fishing, about my blogs (she is VERY interested in the concept of Random Shopping Mr. Bertram!) and so on and so forth.... we chat and crack and bend and natter for a good hour and then it's time to go.

I've had both knees done and my back done first to the left and then to the right and then the big one - right down the middle!!  I'm pleased to see that simply moving into position these days for the "pops" my spine is so free it readily submits before hardly any pressure is used - I'm free!

Out to reception.... so that's thirty eight quid for today and seventeen and a half for missing your last appointment!!  Hang on.... I went in there and she tried to break my back.... and I come out here and .... well, read the title Anne!

It's been a long time coming....

... but we're here at last.... you wan' it? We got it.... Rock City!!

Hello fantastic punters... let normal service resume!

Been out walking and geocache hunting today.... here's a little routemap for you to peruse at your leisure. It's about 6.75 miles with approx 739ft ascent - which is plenty on a hot day like this.

 
Hunted a grand total of eleven geocaches and only found seven - good haul for the day though!

And THAT, as they say... is THAT!

Chamone Michael.

The one gloved, plastic surgery experimenting one, is no more. Fifty years of age is pretty damn young for the king of pop to pop his clogs.... I hope someone has the good sense to let the Big Brother contestants know this sad news!!!!!

As for me.... well. I've been taking LOADS of photos..... been walking a bit..... beat the blind, old aged pensioners, to a pulp on the crown green bowling surface.... got drunk..... and today, I've been baking, and baking, and then baking a bit more.

I've made chocolate brownies, hokey pokey coffee cake, and some sundried tomato and parmesan bread. I still need to ice my cake and sort out the walnut praline for it, but other than that it's a wrap!!

Going out for some noodles tonight. Big Brother eviction night too - woohoo!!


The view across Foxstone Moss - Ironically, I never even knew of our foxy connection. I would have normally referred to this location as Buckstones, but am much happier now I've actually looked it up. It's just more cotton grass.

Say it a bit louder.....

.... make you feel a little bit better.

What a hot day it's been.

I spent the morning practicing a few things that I've recently learned about my camera. Having spent a day on an "improver's" camera course, I've been inspired to point my camera in every direction at every opportunity. Lots of bad photos and a very few decent ones.

This all ties in with the fact that I didn't manage to win a spot on the Colne Valley calendar competition with any of the six shots I sent them!!!! (insert sad smiley here) There were 58 entrants, each submitting six photos and they only could pick thirteen of them, so I guess the odds were against me...... All entries will be exhibited though in September and October, so at least that's something.

I gave up walking and taking pictures when it got too hot. I retreated to the relative comfort of my local bowling club (see bowling cam) for refreshment, and indulged in a couple of handpulled Webster's Best Bitter.


Buzz buzz buzz buzz honey bee, honey bee, do what you like but don't sting me. A piece of clover with a waxy legged bumble bee near Ringstone Edge Reservoir. Just one of a series of shots taken using "manual" camera settings - I'm finally venturing away from the "auto" stuff and getting a bit more creative - twenty two quid well spent on the course then!!

52 Minutes.

It has some very poignant meanings.

Firstly, 52 minutes is a short film about the growing epidemic of knife crime in London. When last I was in London, there were actually mobile metal detecting arches set up on pavements for people to walk through.

Secondly, it's the name of a Canadian rock band. Part of the hardcore/emo scene, whatever that means!!?!? Of course we all know that it means "emotional hardcore" on account of its' "oh so sensitive" lyricism. Those crafty punk wordsmiths.

Thirdly, it was the amount of time it took Barack Obama to deliver two speeches (exactly 26 minutes each) in Europe, which spelled out his desire to rid the world of nuclear weapons and his intention to launch a drive on nuclear disarmament - possibly bigger than any ever attempted - well, it would have to be Mister Obama - We've still got them, so that tells you the level of success of previous "drives" - besides:

Homer: It's pronounced 'nucular'. Nucular.

Fourthly, and most importantly, it was the amount of footage that I recorded last night, of the Big Brother "live" schedule..... during which time, the housemates were getting ready for bed. 52 minutes into my three hour recording schedule, and of course the lights were off and everyone was snoring. They are, without a doubt, the most sleepy bunch of housemates EVER!!!

Snow in summer. A whole heap of Eriophorum near Deer Hill, under a fluffy clouded sky. I could not choose which of the photos to post here, but chose this one just for the sky. That's cotton grass to you and me, dumbo!! You would not believe the difference in weather between yesterday and today.... my birdhouse has blown out of the tree this morning.... now where will I live!!

Force.

Well it started a bit chilly this morning, but by ten o clock it was turning into another scorcher.

Sadly, I'd recorded a few hours of the live Big Brother that went out at one in the morning, and found that it featured three hours of sleeping housemates. A more pointless six hour broadcast I can not imagine.

I fast forward through three hours of sleeping and reach a stage of complete disgust at what a waste of time it's turning into.

I put my boots in the car and grab a bottle of water. I put my camera back together and grab my car keys. I drive out to Blackmoorfoot and embark on a six mile walk in the sweltering sun. It's not long before the sweat is quite literally dripping off me. I find that carrying a rucksack ALWAYS makes me hotter and before long all my clothes are clinging and clammy.

I combine two of my favourite walks into one. I walk round Blackmoorfoot, through Helme, and out to the shooting lodge at Deer Hill. I have so many good photographs from today that I can't imagine I'll ever get round to choosing a suitable selection.

Later this afternoon I spotted an accident on the motorway outside my house. I took a few photos from my bedroom window and managed to get the local newspaper to publish one on the website. I don't know how long this link'll work.


This season's chick. The first real feathers are appearing on this young fuzzy duck. A lovely glassy surface on Blackmoorfoot Reservoir. (I'm always guilty of (badly) photographing wildlife but I like the water surface and first coloured feathers on this little darling, so you have my apologies for yet another duck pic).

Limbo.

For some reason I feel like I'm in limbo.... I think I need to get out of my funk and go and do something..... it's the half life of a Big Brother addict but without the usual companionship of the live feed from the house. Perhaps I'll watch bowling-cam instead??

I am starting to think about camping?? Is that right?? There just seems to be no end to the internet bargains in the camping department, and I get a step closer to indulging with each discount email that manages to resist my spam filter.

Perhaps I'll just swap my quilt for a sleeping bag and kip on the floor instead, and I will still get to drink a decent cup of coffee on demand.

New music to accompany your visit.... and a new photo too.... what more could you ask for?


A skylark rests atop St George's day commemorative stone at Wholestone Hill - part of the White Rose Forest walk.

Getting there.

More by overexposure than by enjoyment, I'm finally succumbing to the lure of Big Brother. It's taken some bloody minded persistence thus far.

The fact that there is no live streaming in this series has meant that I record three hours of the live feed that plays between midnight and six am, and I watch it the next day, on occasion imagining I'm watching it live...... just draw the curtains and pretend it's late.... it's not hard to do.

The lengths I am going to, in order to enjoy the series, have made me realise I'm probably a bit beyond sensible help.

I'm still managing to get out and about (weather permitting) and with a lovely hot day, today, we had an adventure near Wakefield - a feat in its own right - We visited a castle and a country park, neither of which I knew about before today, and both of which were surprisingly enjoyable. I even found a pub for lunch with real ale. Sandal Castle and Newmillerdam country park and boat house.


Conker tree beside the dam at Newmillerdam. A verdant rhapsody.

Careful.

Spent the most part of the day trying to care about Big Brother. It's very difficult to get involved in it without the live feed. Come on Channel 4, bring it back.

Tried to watch Fistful of Dollars... fell asleep.

Ended up caring about my Pokemon far more than I ought to.

Let me just say.....

Be careful what you wish for!!

Would you....

... credit it?

The great British voting public have only gone and elected hatemongers Nick Griffin and Andrew Brons to the European Parliament. Well, let me tell you this, they can have their seats, and their supporters of diminished mental capacity, but they'll never represent me.

If you can be arsed to sign the petition against them, then you probably would have voted against them, but it's not too late to have a say. Sign here against racism and hatred.

We're a bunch of apathetic voters in this country, and the recent expenses row has meant not enough people could be arsed to vote..... Apparently the whole turnout to the European elections has dropped every year since it started thirty years ago, so it's not just us.

There's a lesson in here somewhere and it's not just that we will all get to see, first hand, what a twat Nick Griffin is, although that may well be the case. Shame on us all!!

Wet firework.

Well, razzmatazz it ain't.

The latest series of Big Brother is a complete damp squib. We're just a few days in and.... I've already lost the will to view.

The episode tonight was embarrassingly bad.

I've even lost the will to write down or explore all the failings of the current show.

You've been saved from a real diatribe then!!

I've resorted to downloading a whole heap of Clint Eastwood films to keep me company through the dark hours where I'd normally be watching the Big Brother live feed and making my own mind up about what's really going on in the house.

I suppose I should be paying more attention to the local elections and the European elections......

.... or maybe not!?

Strange....

Let me first announce that, after a gallon of Huddersfield's finest ale.... the blog might not make sense.....

A bunch of "blokes" at the taxi rank, with a bunch of innuendos, as I approach a gentleman that may be "going my way", with a view to making the journey cheaper.

Three pints in, and I notice the strength of a Cornish porter measuring up to a staggering 6% abv which phases me much less than the dogs that like to lick the landlady's face.

Halifax Steam Brewery - Dark Side - Immensely chocolate/coffee dark beer, despite the fact that I'd have really liked to drink the "Shirley Crabtree" at 5.2% abv. Biggest flavoured beer of the night.

I love the beer!!

Despite my promise to not drink and blog..... see above!!!

A game.

It's been a game of two halves.... well to be fair, it's actually been a week of two halves, not really that much of a game.

First half, baking hot, dry, sunburned, and dogsitting.

Second half, in true British style, grey, raining, foggy, cold, and Big Brother.

A strange phenomena that I thoroughly enjoyed today was the first drops of rain falling onto the hot road, causing steam to rise and swirl about at shin height. Like dry ice at a crazy rock gig, swirling and eddying before the road cooled enough for it to stop.

A strange phenomena that I thoroughly didn't enjoy is that:

Big Brother has no live feed this year. This, presumably, is to encourage us to watch the actual Big Brother show and its spin-off counterparts that have, of course, been falling flat on their arses in recent years. The live feeds have been less manipulated, and we've enjoyed being able to make our minds up about the events as they occur rather than the way the editors wish to portray them.

I need a bath and a shave!!! Iced ink!!

Subliminal.

Adverts are not my favourite aspect of existence. Bad adverts are REALLY bad. Adverts that have to carry small print are even worse - Just watch any mascara advert and spot the "filmed with lash inserts" disclaimer to see the pointlessness of it all.

I make no secret that I enjoyed the Smash adverts with the martians. There HAVE been a few that have been worth seeing, but for no more than their intrinsic entertainment purposes. The thought that any of them have made me buy anything is too sorry a conclusion to reach.

Sat, today, as I often do, with the TV blurting into the ether of my living room while I do something completely different..... two adverts dragged my attention away from whatever I was doing, and they compelled me to write:

In jeopardy style, give me the product to the advert:

a) Just pop it up your nose for a couple of minutes, two or three times a day, and start making the most of your summer!!

b) This isn't just music - This is [blank] (A blatant M&S rip off on behalf of Asda - hint: the blank is the name of the band!!)

PS: Big Brother kicks off tonight - I've heard there will be no "live stream" this series and that means I might actually get time to write/eat/wash/sleep during the course of this series.

Too hot for me.

I actually got a chance to say, in live weather oriented conversation, to my neighbour and the free weekly paper delivery man.....

"Oh, it's too hot for my liking"

I nearly shouted "bingo" just after the words had left my mouth and jumped into passing conversation.

At least I have managed to solve the music playing, picture hosting and webcam issues that have been making a mockery of my blog. I nearly, and almost did, set up my own web server so I don't have to rely on them third party freebies to achieve the level of service you've all come to know and love.

I'm hungry and I need to get summat to eat..... and a cold beer!!

I'll be back to posting more pictures as soon as this hot weather subsides and I come back indoors.

Golden oldies.

A Sunday super search spectacular, just for old time's sake. For those that don't know, I used to pick my favourite search entries that brought people to my blog, and to point them in the right direction for the best answers.

Here goes.....

1) jenni falconer smoking (Google) - I am still amazed at the number of people that come to this site by this search. I think some time back I worked out that Jenni Falconer had something to do with some anti-smoking campaign or something.... anyway.... Smoking fetishists everywhere... enjoy!!

2) diving sparth reservoir (Google) - Diving?? In Sparth Reservoir??? Are you mad??? Now, I do know a bit about Sparth Reservoir as it's on my regular walking routes. It lies at the edge of Marsden and it's a hotspot for kids to swim in when the weather's as hot as it has been for the last few days. The only diving I know that happened there was last year when some kids found clothes dumped next to the reservoir and the search teams went in.... nothing was found. Here's a picture or two of Sparth though.

3) tri wing b&q (Google) - Look, you're just not going to find a tri-wing screwdriver at B&Q. Well, I tell a small lie there, you may well find a tri-wing bit in one of those driver bit packs that you can buy, but if you're looking for a tri-wing driver, I can probably guess it's for console modding!! Have a look here for the cheapest deal I found when I was looking for mine. They don't even charge for postage!!

4) what is the difference between an arctic fox and a fox? (Google) - About 2000 miles!!! Boom boom!!

5) j s q d u a o t t (Google) - Incredible that someone should search for this, and I had to research it myself to realise why they ended up here whilst looking for it. Those are the letters of the final Countdown selection when Carol "thinking man's crumpet" Vordermann was "retired" from the show. For further information purposes..... and an extra nerd point.... both contestants formed the word "quotas".... Carol wept, and so did the nation when we were left with the annoying replacement, Rachel Riley.

6) do artic foxes use water for anything other than drinking (Google) - In short, yes. Cooking, bathing, washing the car, watering the garden, filling the birdbath.... you know, all the regular watery type stuff. PS: Pet hate - it's "arCtic", not "artic"!!!!!

7) concede a frame in "virtual pool" 3 (Google) - I played it a lot and would never concede a frame!! I don't think there's a quick key command that correlates to conceding a frame, and I can't find the instructions either.... you could look here though. The full instructions are here. The keyboard shortcuts are here.

8) hot water bottle tummy fetish (Google) - Say what now?

9) wallpaper girls (AltaVista) - I'm just amazed that anyone still uses altavista!! Just move across to Google and marvel at the results!!

10) haikus for arctic fox (Google) - I imagine you could give any haiku you like to an arctic fox. If, however, you were looking for haiku ABOUT arctic foxes, then they are few and far between.... My gift to you:

In winter, in white.
Changing coats with the season.
In summer, in blue.
(Arctic Fox May 2009)