oh my dog....

first time i've nearly been clattered by a deer running past me (from behind me) at breakneck speed, presumably trying to escape the chase given by my dog..... the deer appeared down a track, out of nowhere..... and for a moment, i thought it must be the dog reappearing behind me until this thing.....

shot past like a bullet from a gun...... thundering hooves.... leapt a stream and disappeared up a banking and into the woodland......

All within six foot of my shoulder......  it was TERRIFYING and took a few minutes to sink in.

anyhow.... the dog's been severely reprimanded...... so went and found another deer and it all started again......

groans!

Now.... member back when i was on about Dumfries and Galloway Libraries and their Friday writing challenge?  They've gone and made a monkey out of me...... no sooner said than they changed the bloody brief.....  it's now a load of books and you have to work the titles into a piece of writing..... so i thought i'd start my own challenge.....

Friday writing challenge #1

here's a photo..... using this photo as a prompt, please gimme a 50 word story, or a haiku... (i'd love to have them in my comments but feel free to take this away and use it for your own blog piece)

So as not to skew the process, i'll either add mine to comments later, or add one tomorrow.....

graft

Been up on the moor again.....  i am always minded of one of my all-time favourite films....

Go. Stay on the road. Keep clear of the moors.

Sage advice given that we know what happens next.

Well, against the advice, we went up there.....

Today we were tackling drainage channels that had been put in previously across the packhorse trail out of Marsden, going up towards March Haigh, up Willykay Clough.

The drainage channels are made up of a series of stones that are buried in a line, in order to take the water away from the path and out onto the moor, where it can do less damage.  in fact, water held on the moorland is a positive.... keeps the peat stable and the moss damp and provides some amount of fire resistance.

So there we were.... unblocking, re-setting the stones, and generally making sure the flow goes where it is wanted/needed.

Then.... i've heard the term before, but i'm instructed to clear the dead Molinia from the path.... at this point, i imagine you're about as confused as i was.... considering i'd been given a "blue flower, red thorns" task to keep me out of the way of the real work.

So what is it......

Start at the beginning..... Molinia..... it's a moorland grass..... named after a dude from Chile in the 19th century - Juan Ignacio Molinia....  who knew?  Anyways it's that long straggly moorland grass that takes over everything and provides the perfect combustible material as it covers the moorland.  it's a bit of an evolutionary success in that it takes over EVERYTHING.

Not my pic (stolen) but a good example of what Molinia looks like......

The broken strands of Molinia are carried around the moorland and catch in every gully, on every fence, gatepost, leg, bag, sheep.... you name it.

When the strands collect on the footpath, they get waterlogged and form a sort of soggy thatch, which, to all intent and purpose, not dissimilar to shredded wheat, stop the path from drying out and causes the water to not flow properly.... thus the path starts to degrade, or to erode.....

So i scraped the Molinia off the paths and hoyed it over my shoulder and back onto the open moorland..... it was pretty backbreaking scraping and bending and stuff.... but it was nice in the sunshine and all that jazzamatazz.

And here's one i cleared earlier......  a drain across the packhorse trail.... a bag, a mattock, a spade, and a Molinia free path..... my office for the day.

And, just because i can, here's the seven dwarves, off across Eastergate at Marsden at the start of the day.....

all those...

i have started my blog entry for today.... umpteen times.

i've flipped and flopped and changed the subject with every attempt.

sometimes we're just blogging for the sake of it... aren't we?

Here are a few things that almost made it into print:

• happy nineteenth anniversary to me and Dawn.
• beers i've drunk
• phone call to doctors
• more moss talk
• another haiku?
• a list of the amazing attributes of Dawn and my disbelief at how she's managed to put up with me for nineteen years
• a list of things that have happened in the last nineteen years
• me versus rat

i think i'll just back away from today with the following....

winter turns over,

pulls the duvet up the bed,

hits the snooze button.

A wistful photo of Dawn and Sookie highlighted in the gloom..... 

hit it

go up on the moors, and hit them with a hammer.

I've told you about ~"reprofiling" before haven't i?

ok brief summary......

Water all over t'shop.  Peat, water, cotton grass, moss, heather..... all over t'wicket, as they say in Yorkshire. 

Water needs to run off.... and to an extent there are big efforts into slowing the flow of that water so it's gradual release causes less stress down the water courses.

Sometimes water drips off stuff and starts to erode the peat.... it's catch 22!  Instead of a nice gentle slope to the water channels, across the moorland, you end up with eroded peat and an undercut banking that can "calve" much like a chunk of ice might fall from a glacier, or ice sheet, sending lichen, moss, and peat, tumbling into the gully.  The gully gradually gets wider and wider, and in some cases, whole patches slide down the hillside.

So...... whatcha gonna do?

You get a digger, and you dig out the undercut banking, and compact it back down, and re-lay the vegetation over them so they have a nice, natural, gradual slope of between 33 and 45 degrees.  The water runs down to the gully without further erosion of the valuable peat.

Piece of piss!

What happens when you can't get hold of a digger, or you can't get a digger into the location?  People power, mate!  In fact.... mostly, volunteer people power.

So that's where i've been.... out on Marsden Moor, with a spade, a lump hammer, a tamper, and the ubiquitous mattock.

spent the day hammering, digging, sloshing, swirling, and stomping the moorland back into what can only be described as ..... better than it was!

The sod  cut, lifted.

Land scraped, scratched, pounded, reshaped.

Moss carpet re-laid.

and that's a National Trust haiku......  you're welcome.

I am gonna say this is an RAF Airbus A400M Atlas...... but what would i know?  Put me right?

come back....

  a wise man once said.... everything changes.

"Who was this wise man?", you may well be asking.  Confucius? Plato? Metrostophocleese?

In actual fact, the identity of the soothsayer in question shall, forever, remain a mystery......  and the tale began thus.....

Castle Douglas, a small town in Dumfries and Galloway, just over the border into Scotland, and turn left.  The time.... i dunno, let's say 8 years past, for argument's sake.

We were actually on a fishing trip, my uncle, his brother, and i.  Fishing Loch Ken.  A sort of piscatorial pilgrimage for my uncle, who used to live ithere, and has passed down his love of the area to us all.  We regularly visit the area now, and we love the hostelries, walking, hostelries, swimming, fishing and hostelries of the area.  The Sulwath Brewery Tap is a particular highlight for any fan of people-watching.

Anyhoo....

John (uncle's brother) and i were planning an afternoon away from the fishing, so we headed into town on a sunny afternoon.  We had our crown green bowls and all the gear in the car for this eventuality, so we headed down the local bowling club....

Wrong shoes, wrong woods, wrong everything......

* the balls used in bowling are called "woods" cos they were originally made of lignum vitae - henceforth, when i mention "wood" or "woods" i am just referring to the round things you launch across the grass.

They don't know much about crown green when you're north of the border, it's all straight line, flat bowling.....

The members of the club were kinda dismissive of us and insisted we wore spare shoes (they were all ladies shoes, of course) and that we used some spare woods and equipment from the club.

Eventually we got a game together and we were blissfully traversing the green, end to end, and back and forth..... i was leading quite easily until John got to grips with the green and started his comeback..... well, it turned into a bit of a tussle and all the other club members had finished their games and packed up and were leaving.

"you can lock up and post the key through the door when you're done" and a few other comments were made as they passed us.

Almost the last guy leaving the area, stopped to talk to us just as my wood was nestling up to the jack at the other end of the green.  It was by far the best i had launched that day.  He turned to us and asked.... "whose wood is that?" and i proudly raised my hand,,,,,,

"everything changes" he said and promptly walked off.....

At the time it didn't register..... minutes later i began to dwell on it.... what the hell does that mean?  COME BACK!  WHAT DO YOU MEAN?  Too late, of course......

Hardly a day goes by when i don't consider those words.... or the philosopher that uttered them.  In my head, the challenge of finding the meaning is akin to the sound of one hand clapping, or the tree falling in a forest and nobody around to hear it, or indeed a Schrodinger's cat......

Everything changes!

Feel free to ponder it at your leisure.

archive footage of a pint of Black Galloway in the marvellous Sulwath Tap.....

PS - John eventually won the game convincingly.... almost as if it were prophesised.

rain rain go away

 a wise man once said.... there is no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothing.

mostly, i find that to be true.

we went for a walk with the dog today, on what we'd normally describe as one of them days where you'd open the door and go.... "you know what, let's not do this" and head back to watch some prick like Joh Torode cooking some "simple" dishes in his sanitised studio kitchen, pretending to be all "real".... or something.

Well.... the rain it did fall, and the wind blew what could only be described as a "hoolie".

down Outlane, a direction that always provokes an allergic reaction in our dog.  By the time we'd walked 100 yards, her anxiety levels were already dialled up to 11.  Sookie is undoubtedly a creature of habit, and down the village isn't one of her habits.  We pressed on down Mulehouse Lane, down a section of Swan Lane then turned down the muddy track, Jagger Green Dean, past the remnants of a disused mink farm and down, till we were overlooking the deer farm in the valley floor.

Even the deer were sheltering under the trees at the edge of their paddock.

Straight on for a while towards Jagger Green, past Neil's bench.... I've no idea who Neil was but Jo loved him and put a bench in his favourite spot, which had a good view, and i could imagine why someone would love it there.

Jagger Green to Old Lindley - we know a safe field here where we gave Sookie some much needed 2off lead" time, and she runs like the wind, looping round and leaping over tussocks.  Dawn throws dog treats and their grassy hiding spots are no match for Sookie's snout.  Quickly found and devoured.  A few good sprints up and down the hill and she's free from the anxieties and tension that have built up during the walk.  We know she's a happier dog on the rest of the walk.

Out of the field and back on the road through Old Lindley, we shortcutted, straight up the track on the right, up to Turley Coat Lane, before re-joining our route back up the village to home.

No'but three mile or something but we went up and down some hills (as you often do round here) so it felt like we'd had a good stretch of legs.  Clothes wet, dripping in fact.  Dog tired.  We dry the dog off and she get's a good treat - today it was a furry rabbit's ear, and she runs upstairs to her bed where she enjoys her reward.

Always there's a million reasons NOT to do something but when you push through, and force yourself to do something, i always feel well rewarded, knowing i've beaten the negative thoughts i had when i first opened the door to the storm.

A rather fetching pile of rust......

raindrop and snowdrops......

how do you get down

had a bit of a lie in.... and a lazy start to the day.

mooched around the kitchen, drank coffee, made toast.

pottered around the kitchen, the garden, stirred some compost, shuffled the wormery.

Went for a walk - blue skies, sunshine, it feels lovely to be out there.

In a field, along the wall, parallel to Round Ings Road.... a flurry of feathers, scattered in the grass.  I bend to pick one up, to examine it, to test my knowledge.  I'm none the wiser and tuck the feather into the hem of my woolly hat.

Later, at home, i remember the quill, secreted.  Reach up and gently pluck it from its safe place.  I gently stroke it, restoring the position and neatness of the filaments.

Dark "curly brackets" interspersed by wavy fawn bands.  Looks familiar, but can't quite decide.

Plover of some sort?  Snipe?  Curlew?  Tawny owl?

I'm reminded of the ten minutes before my dalliance with the unemployment centre.... i sauntered into the library, recently moved from its usual location to a far less grand position.  Ten minutes to kill.  I set myself a challenge.... find the computer books, and find a picture (drawn or photographed) of a golden plover.

The computer section was thin.... it's been probably twenty years since i worked in IT and i dare say i've more books on computing than the library possesses.

I found a picture of some sort of plover but i still don't know whether it was the one i wanted.

still wondering to what the feather belonged..... i combine the two concepts of my library quest and use technology to identify the feather, relying on Google Lens to search it out.... it tells me it's an owl feather.... i don't believe it.

I search for "curlew feather" and i think the search ends here.....

the feather

it must be a sign......

scrounger

it's official..... i am out of work.

i have, as of 11am today, become a "jobseeker".

this coms as no surprise to anyone that has already read anything i've written lately, but the difference now is that i've actually "signed on".

I'm a dole scrounger, ineligible for universal credit, at the mercy of the creaking, outdated, and archaic benefit of the jobseeker's allowance.

Once a fortnight hence, i'll be summoned to the bunker, to be escorted by a security guard, to sit on blue vinyl sofa, waiting for someone to peer over their glasses at me and for them to prod, poke, and generally exam the efforts i am putting into looking for a job, in the vain hope that they'll once more grant me the privilege of getting some wolf bait, that should stop my legs being torn asunder as i sleep. 

It's a small amount of money but i am entitled to it.  I HAD originally decided not to apply for it, but it's mine and i don't see why i shouldn't get it.

Alone, this money would probably have me drowning in debt within a few weeks of claiming.

i've got a bit of breathing room now to find the job i want rather than the job i am forced to take.

meanwhile, the unscrupulous twats that orchestrated this mess, leaving a trail of debt and destruction in their wake, continue unscathed.

Dear The Taxpayer..... if you see any beer made by the Keystone Group - feel free to shoplift it (but i wouldn't advise drinking it).... after all you've paid for it.

Sorry!

somehow this picture conjours up all sorts of emotions in me...... there are so many options but they all lie in the same direction...... and it's also massively "oversigned" and confusing for apparently no reason......  the simple has become really complicated.  Enjoy.

hillocks

hummocks, hillocks, mattocks, and pillocks!  With a side order of rhododendrons, all washed down with copious amounts of rainwater.

as Simon Armitage once said......

<quote>

....But I

skimmed flat stones across Black Moss on a day

so still I could hear each set of ripples

as they crossed. I felt each stone's inertia

spend itself against the water; then sink.

<end quote>

well.... i CAN tell you that it was not like that up at Black Moss today.

Let me give you some idea.....

The privilege of being free to ramble on open moorland, unfettered by paths and stiles and gates, is not one i take for granted.  We are there to make things better and it means getting off the track.

heading deep into peatlands, tussocky grass, moss, heather..... and rhododendrons.

our job, to hit the rhodies with the mattocks until they wept their toxic sap upon the heather.

The weather was not kind.  It was windy, and the rain, it did fall upon us.

strung out in a line, sweeping the moorland like an episode of CSI trying to find the intruders, and smash them up.

our square kilometre was traversed one way and then the other......  we probably did a tenth of the square in total, today.

White hare, golden plover, black grouse, grey sky..... the rewards for struggling through difficult terrain while the moorland clawed at our legs in a bid to reclaim us and to pull us into the very peat.

exhibit A, your honour..... the mattock

Exhibit B, your honour, my office for the day..... walking down Black Moss towards Wessenden Head. looking across Marsden towards Pole Moor in the distance.... before the rain came.

confusion

 twang....

confusion.....

twang......

You just can't believe me

When I show you what you cannot see....

It's a day of admin for me.

I've been filing emails, reading pdf files, storing paperwork.... usual stuff that always seems to pile up.

I may or may not have eluded to this, but some unscrupulous buggers closed our brewery down.

They failed to pay our wages, holiday pay, redundancy, notice pay..... or indeed any of their debts or suppliers.

We are in the process of claiming from the government, all the money we are owed.....

The letter came today to tell us what we're gonna get paid, and of course it's wrong.

Everyone seems to have a letter that is wrong in varying degrees..... in my case, the holiday pay due to me is wrong, as is the wage owed to me for January...... but at least the redundancy pay is right, so one out of three!

Now we have to jump through a load more hoops to try and get the whole thing fixed.

It really goes to show that this shower of shit that ran us, failed because they were literally unable to organise a piss-up either in or out of a brewery.

DON'T BELIEVE THE HYPE!

here's a picture of me dog sporting her new collar and eating a treat.

treats by Norman's Nibbles

collar by KJ's Dog Collars and Crafts 

plants by Dawn!

orange

 there was an orange ball in the sky.... it wasn't there for long.... but i saw it.

the moorland was golden, the ground crusted by frosty fingers, the grass is dry and straw coloured.  Clumps of ginger, broken bracken and browned-off heather.

We headed to Eastergate.  Parked up and surveyed some furniture..... a gate, some benches, a walk onto Close Gate.  Everything looked fine.  The benches were sturdy, the signposts were in good shape.

Walking up to Green Owlers, we checked the stile.... missing a dog gate and the fence was forlorn.

Onto the moor.....

Looking at boardwalks on Naze End and Hatter Lee, we noted the repairs needed to some wooden stringers.

Quick dip down into the edge of  Haigh Clough to look at a stone footbridge.

Using some fancy app, the furniture was observed.  Any repairs were prioritised and described.  Photos were taken.

But to be out there, in the sun, with the icy wind keeping the sweat from forming on your brow.

Glorious.

here's a picture taken from the footbridge in Haigh Clough facing NNE.

fiddy summink

 yesterday i started posting about a 50 mile walk with my 50 year old pal.... and i knew there was another "fifty" that had inspired the "fiddy" theme......

Occasionally i write a haiku.

occasionally i write a series of words that conform to the structure of haiku but they don't conform to the ethos of haiku, in that they don't necessarily evoke thoughts of the natural world.... some might say seasonal..... or weather.... or nature.... it's hard to put your finger on it.

making a haiku isn't just syllable counting!!

i am guilty on that charge.

not too distantly, on facebook, i did a haiku-a-day for a couple of weeks and some of them fell into the syllable counting trap.

Now.... let's set aside haiku for one moment.

We occasionally holiday in the Dumfries and Galloway area of Scotland.... we love it up there.... My relatives used to live there.... it's where i took Dawn on our first "away" weekend together..... we have a lot of nice memories up there and the walking, fishing, beaches, swimming.... it's all good.

So, for one reason, or another, i started following the facebook page for the Dumfries and Galloway Libraries......  Every Friday they post a photo and encourage people to :

"Give us a story in 50 words.... or a haiku"

And you know what.... i think only myself and one or two people really contribute to it..... so.... what i thought would be nice..... maybe some bloggers could head over and support their Friday challenge....  it's right up your street, i know it is..... i'd love to see a few people hit it.

So THAT was the other "fifty" that i forgot yesterday....

go write something on one of their story haiku challenges at Dumfries & Galloway Libraries - tell everyone to bring their word game!

member- they hold them on Fridays, so scroll back a bit or make sure you're there on the next Friday.... i'll try and remind thee!

hope to see you there.

I thank you

here's a picture from the Dumfries and Galloway area when we last visited there. (Sept 24)

Lakeland fells, distant.

'neath speckled robin's egg blue.

Give me the treat now!

fiddy

 just finished the last leg of the Calderdale Way - "but you live in Kirklees", you might say... "why are you bothering with the Calderdale Way?"..... let me tell you a story.....

I have Calderdale roots.

as long back as i know, my Grandma.... go on children, get it out of the way.... my grandma, Fanny Bush, ok that's enough...... and her husband Ned Peaker.... had the post office up at Clifton (near Brighouse) in Calderdale.

We used to go and stay with Fanny.... i never really knew my grandad.

Fanny wasn't a fan of young boys, she preferred the girls of the clan, and i was regularly nipped or made to somehow squeal when out of eyesight of anyone else.

Anyhow..... i've got some Calderdale roots.....  i used to go to Grandma's for Sunday lunch or for sleepovers when mum was out galivanting or summat..... whatever single parents gotta do i guess.

Part of the walk traversed the foot of Clifton Common, so i felt connected.

So we chose Calderdale Way - it's a 50 mile circular..... we started, and we stopped, at Norland Moor, right next to what was once the excellent pub, The Moorcock..... now being partitioned off into houses.... as many fine hostelries before.

We walked up from West Vale, up past Clay House and along the edge of North Dean Woods, to Norland Moor, a mere cock-stride of three-and-a-half miles for the final leg.  Up past Clay House and along the edge of North Dean Woods,

here's a photo of my walking buddy, using the mighty staff of hill climbing..... in his 50th year on the 50 mile circular..... resolving fifty times never to do this again.

and here's another one of the infamous and ubiquitous carpet beating waymarker...... courtesy of the cliff top path through North Dean Woods:

dullish

 went for a walk.....

watched someone on telly find some gold....  through the passage of time.

played a movie ** - randomly selected of course...... blew my own tiny mind. (Dawn walked off mid-movie, which means it was too weird).

did a shop......

made some food.......

subsistence living.

stayed up too late....

got the nosebags ready for tomorrow (final leg of the Calderdale Way)...... 

forgot to blog.

expertly cleaned my coffee machine.

and they all lived happily ever after.... the end?

** as always you can read my mini-reviews here.

here's a miserable photo of my two favourite ladies.....

green

 Alright, alright.... it's proper felt like a Sat'day today.

Went out for a walk with me mate.

Headed out of Slawit, up Hilltop, past t'res...... up Merrydale, over Cop Hill and down Marsden Lane.  Passed the end of a sorry looking ** Sparth Reservoir, and made a beeline across a bridge marked as "closed" - once across realising just why it was closed and deciding never to use that bridge again.....  Called at Wild Cafe for a brew...... back up to Manchester road to the Olive Branch and back onto the canal through their beer garden by Square Dam..... all the way back to Slawit.

Bloody cold wind.

Airless, stuffy, sweaty climb out of Merrydale.

Lovely old packhorse trail that runs between Marsden and Halifax - y'all heard of the Piece Hall?  Well, that's the route the cloth went on to get there, innit.

5 miles....  nice steady walk.... here's a map if you like that sort of thing

Phoned the doctor to get two appointments - one appointment is to book cos they texted me to book one to discuss my cholesterol, but they don't have a nurse free to talk about it till middle of march.... i mean.... you're gonna tell me to take statins, just prescribe 'em over the phone and save yourselves some time.  

The other appointment..... i need a face-to-face to talk about a trapped nerve which is actually giving me a bit of jip....  remember my suspected "heart attack" that i actually think is a trapped nerve in my shoulder and it is keeping me awake at night..... middle of march before i can see someone.....  i'll be bloody tired by then.  Ring back Monday.... wow, ok, join the queue Monday and no doubt get through to speak to someone at the same time that i am due in the dole office.....

Country's gone to t'dogs, mate.

Here's a little montage of pics from today - they were all shit photos in their own right but you get the idea.... winter sun, green mossy stuff happening....... some lovely worn stones on the packhorse trail...blah blah blah.

Now, go away.

dole

 i've signed on.

in fact, i signed on.... some time ago..... on the 4th of Feb.... i was advised..... 

<quote>

You’ve submitted your New Style Jobseeker’s Allowance (JSA) application.

You submitted your application on: 04/02/2025

What happens next

We will process your application and keep you updated on its progress.

<end quote>

And so you may join me in your surprise that ten days later, i have still not heard ANYTHING!

I feel sorry for the people who really need it cos it'd be very stressful indeed.  Anyone would think they didn't want you to claim that to which you are entitled.

Anyways, as i said at one point today.... onwards and ....... onwards!

I have, on this very day, been "reprofiling" the moorland.

It's like painting the Forth Bridge using peat, heather and hammers.

Essentially we were turning eroded banks of peat that run alongside streams into shallow slopes that run alongside streams.  The tools for this particular job were lump hammers and tampers.  Heavy metal swinging, in chain-gang style while singing cotton-grass picking songs at the top of our lungs.

Bloody hard work to be fair..... bloody hard work...... bloody endless task...... but the camaraderie and fresh air were the best medicine for someone looking for their path in life.... i.e. me!

I'm knackered.....

I saw a kingfisher this morning darting along the canal before we started work...... and i spent the day amongst grouse and geese..... it tried to snow on us and at one point i went to view a hummock of assorted sphagnum mosses.

here's a photo of a kingfisher......  i know, right?

most random

 a day of very random things.

i had a "lie in" - a rarity, and not something i do often.

i got a new broadband router cos the old one (8 years long in the tooth) was driving me round the bend... seems stable enough after almost throwing a so-called "smart" TV, through the window and into the street for being so stubborn, despite me having memorised the new weefee key after so many attempts.....

got some new dog collars for me pooch....  Found this lassie, on Facebook, who makes collars for the sighthound types of dog.... very charitable and crafty she is, so i asked her for a couple and they arrived, all bespoke like!  I'll post pictures soon.

took my mum down the 'ospital for some eye tests..... i imagine  this will be a hereditary thing that. no doubt, is already at play in my peepers .... macro magnetic degenemeration or summat, i forget the term.....  oh yeah.... macular degeneration(?) i think.  Tests looked alright and it's nowt to be worried about at this stage.

took the dog for a drag round the field..... muddy, cold, wet, miserable...... my one moment of levity was when i passed a grandma, videoing her kids, playing in the woods..... as i passed her, i said "fortunately we've seen a squirrel, so children are definitely off the menu".... she said "pardon" and i am sure she was reaching for a can of mace as i legged it into the undergrowth.....

took some codeine.

rebaited a rat station that had been emptied (good sign) - as much as i have respect for a rat's ability to survive, thrive, and even multiply **..... i do not necessarily want them playing croquet on my lawn.

Stuffed a couple of rocks into a couple of rat 'oles in the garden.

finally remembered how to reconnect "her who shunt be named" - say it quiet in case she is listening (they are ALWAYS listening) - Alexa - to the new router.

Not very exhaust ive/ing, i am sure you'll agree..... but suitably random a set of incidents.

ear's a picture of me dog, eating a pig's ear!

**  i was going to make mention of the fact that rats have a bad rap ever since the days when they were accused of carrying black death or bubonic plague, whichever camp you sit in.  There IS another school of thought that suggests it came from gerbils from the Asia.... and you know what, people invite those little tramps into their home and build fking castles for em!

oi, mosschops!

 today was possibly the start of something new for me....

I volunteered to do work.... i know, right, normally you couldn't pay me enough money to get out of bed and listen to your bullshit, but this is different....

For those of you what knows me, you'll know, i'm not "normal" - i don't do "normal" things.... and work is a good example.... we've all been there.... i hate my job, i hate my boss, i hate my life..... well, surprise surprise, in my 40 years (minus a hefty spell where i did what i want and didn't go to work) i've never really had that thought that i am drowning in my own work related problems......

a) i've never applied for a job, had an interview, and got a job.

b) i've never had a job that wasn't doing something i loved

c) i don't usually last more than 5 years in a job cos i usually say FAR too much - i don't have a folter - if i see it and it pisses me off i generally call it out

So, here i am in a trough.... in-between crests of employment where i can honestly say, i've done some amazing work..... and let's put this in perspective, i don't mean i did all the work by any stretch of the imagination, but i've picked the team members..... i've divvied up the tasks.... i've instilled the work ethic. the standards..... the metrics..... the pride, passion, yadda yadda yadda.....

I remember once watching an Andy Goldsworthy documentary (he's only my favourite artist of all time - works in the medium of which we'd call land art(?).... and in this documentary there was a guy driving a digger making this thing and a load of people building this drystone wall..... and i identify with that......  these good people can build the thing.... the vision.... but it's one person's vision)

I am VERY grateful for the hard work of everyone who has helped me/us achieve so much over the years - i am indebted to them......

Anyways.... i think it's time to try something different..... so today i hopped over to a nearby village, checked in with the National Trust Office there and started my volunteering episode.

We tidied up a storage yard.... stacked some stakes, moved some timber, tidied up and old container, moved some bags of fertilizer..... chopped some firewood..... you know the kind of thing...... and then.....

w e  p l a n t e d  m o s s 

MOSS!

sphagnum, to more more precise, and of the twenty or so species of sphagnum, we planted fallax, to be even more precise!!  I forgot to take pics.... i'll try and find a stock image.

oh, here's an interesting article about sphagnum fallax..... go on, fill your boots.

Anyways.....  bit of hard manual graft..... followed by an hour and a bit in the polytunnel.....

Going back Thursday for another go...  will take photos, promise.

Here's a photo of my friend, Rich..... he had a big birthday today.... and i made him a birthday card featuring his image from this pic - i like the pic a lot because a) he never usually poses for pics and b) it very much reminds me of the crucified monkeys from planet of the apes..... see what you think.... hapopy birthday Rich! x

feels treasurey

 Monday.... yuk.....

The weather can only be described as "dreich" - we've got moor grime, driving rain, snow flurries, low light, and a steady south-easterly blowing in.

And today, just to rub a bit of salt in the wounds of an unemployed man, i had the indignity of getting up to the sound of an alarm clock for the benefit of a phlebotomist.

8:10am for someone to stick the needle in?  Oh, the humanity!!

Anyhow....

Came home, sent the dog out with the dog walker for an hour (she's currently baking in a cast of dried mud, next to a radiator) and i got cracked on with a bit of cooking.....

Made some spiced chickpea and potato dish... I was given the cookbook many years ago when i WAS actually vegan by a good friend, Gareth,,,,,  Suffice to say, he's no longer with us, but i am minded of him each time i look at the book, and the dish has a deep importance to me.... recipe available if anyone fancies a middle eastern inspired vegan chickpea and potato dish?

Baked a few 'taters.... 

And then.... uncharacteristically.... we grabbed some lunch and sat and watched a movie.  Middle of the day, on a Monday, during the daylight hours..... sitting down to watch a film..... it feels wrong and indulgent on so many levels.

(all the films i watched are "micro reviewed" here)

here's a photo from the dog walk we did yesterday - i bloody love this mossy wall.....  stay tuned for more moss chat!

IT'S NOT SUNDAY

 Actually by the time i typed this it WAS Sunday.... i mean it IS Sunday.

but blog times run 24 hours previous.... so today is generally writing about yesterday, cos usually when i write, today isn't over, and something blog/note worthy might still happen.

As for Saturday (yesterday).... nothing much DID happen.

OK... We put a new lid on the chicken coop - long overdue, but I've been working hard to "seal" with special bitumen friendly sealant, the areas where water might make ingress.  It now looks and feels so much better.

Made some pretty nice food for tea (we call our evening meal "tea", innit, cos we're Yorkshire, not bloody burk-shire!  I made a real nice coleslaw to go along with some vegan burgers and fries and that....  extra gherkins of course!

Spent the morning with our granddaughter.... doing the usual thing.... repeatedly filling a cup with juice or finding the next snack.... today i was surprised to find that a dissected pear and a little easy-peeler were enough to sate the hunger.  A lot of pineapple juice was consumed.  We played some games, made some paper aeroplanes. kicked orange peel around the kitchen pretending it was a snake..... you get the idea.

Then, we binge watched Dexter - Original Sin - it's a bit "cartooney" compared to the Dexter series of old, but it's been an alright watch, and some of the characters are good.  We're up to  date with it now but there's more to come so i'll reserve judgement on the whole series until the end.

Took dog for a walk.... it was snowing.

Left my camera at home.

Good night.

saturday banana

 i am sure i used to watch a TV programme called Saturday Banana.... it was probably shite.... they usually were.

Completely unrelated to Saturday.... it's Friday, so I've no idea where Saturday came from but.... let's assume my grasp of what day of the week we are on has almost gone now.

Haven't done right much today...

Took the dog for a walk up on Wholestone Moor.... the wind was icy and cut through my clothing with ease.  Carry in bag of dog poo and a dog lead as the hound tore around in circles around me, i looked at my hands and they were purple and blue.  It was bitter.

Went to talk to a "ranger" about doing some volunteer work out on the moorland around my local vicinity.

The meeting, unlike the job hunting, was both positive and constructive.  Not that I should be surprised, because.... who wouldn't think they were getting a bargain when they were getting ME for FREE?

I am off on a work party on Tuesday and i look forward to learning some new skills..... meeting some good people who care about things that don't necessarily exist in the here and now.... they are working towards a future, a legacy..... and yeah, i could be part of that..... gotta try and make it pay, somehow.

Mebbe I'll crowdfund some shares in me?

I WAS going to go down to Tunnel End and thrill you with a photo and some stats about a big hole in the ground.... but when i got there it was all "no parking" and stuff..... so i turned round and you'll have that treat another day.  Here's Marsden train station, holding its breath until the summer hordes of revellers land on it.  By 'eck it were freezin' on t'bridge.

rattus rattus

After the "excitement" of the last couple of days, it's time for something more sedate.

Spent the day "socialising" which as most of you will know, is WAY out of my comfort zone!

Woke up to the phone ringing with someone more or less questioning my motives as to why i'd applied for their job - i'm far too qualified but you can't really say "i just applied cos it's a 5 minute drive from my house, mate" but i think i offered words to that effect, given that it was 8am.

So it begs the question.... what do you wanna be when you grow up..... and for as long as i can remember, my stock answer has been..... a dolphin or a baker..... i mean, a baker's day is usually over by early afternoon, and i reckon i'd make a pretty good friend to all those dolphin friendly tuna out there......

And that brings me onto my new ambition....

I want to become a philosopher.....  i mean, i've always thought stamps are very interesting.

Good bye

Here's what i'd probably be supping if i weren't doing vegan/dry Feb....

Lumch today was excellent at the Wild Cafe near Marsden

bit stressy

 yesterday tings started to get a bit stressy.

Went for a walk with the dog - it rained sideways.

Signed on to receive the "new" jobseekers allowance - whatever that means?

Got a greedy burn on my gob from a vegan cheese and onion toastie that was consumed too eagerly.

Had a heart attack...

you know the sort of thing.... 

I lie about the heart attack bit, obviously.... but in all seriousness, i had a bit of a scare.

Upon returning from the dog walk, i towel-dried the mutt, hang all my gear up to dry, got changed into some fresh threads, made a bit of lunch.

Sat down to eat my lunch and my watch started beeping.... i looked at the thing and it was telling me..... heart alarm!!  Never seen this before, so grabbed my phone and looked at the numbers..... sitting there at rest, 130-140 beats.... hmmmm .... feeling a bit hot..... hmmmm.

I munched a couple of carrots and the heart rate didn't seem to be changing.

Eventually after over an hour it settled but still quite high.

Now, i;ve had a few aches and pains down me left hand side, pass the dutchie pon etc.  Aching arm, pins and needles, a bit of a throb in me gullet......  so i phoned 111.

Long story short.....  ended up in A&E and had some blood tests and and an ECG... all routine stuff..... blood tests come back and i am ushered into a room...... basically the numbers were suggesting i might have had a heart attack but then again i might not..... it's all about the numbers and the timing and stuff.  Anyway, turns out i probably didn't have a heart attack and the other symptoms don't point exactly in that direction either.  So they let me go..... it seemed like a fifty fifty until the final minute as to whether i was gonna have to stay in.....

I left with the words in my ear.... "we're much happier if you come in early and it's this result than coming in too late with another ending"..... so i felt ok.  I think we all tend to feel like we're wasting everyone's time when we have niggles, right?

So.... i looked around me at all the stress.... and it's a difficult time just now to be sure.

They tell me that mindfulness is good to cope with stress, so today, i took it easy, did one of them mindful colouring books and drew a mandala.... perfect relaxation.

the dog

between stopping writing my blog and restarting the process, we lost our faithful dog Stevie, and gained our unfaithful dog, Sookie.

Anyone who claims that a dog is man's best friend, has obviously never meet Sookie.

Now, before any of my Russian speaking friends start jumping up and down... yes, i know what Sookie means.  I've also had my eyes opened by the definitions available to us in the Urban Dictionary.

To give our dog her full Sunday name, she's Sookie Agnes Pinchington.  The name was a mash-up of various suggestions, all boiled down into a gelatinous gloop and thrown at her.  Poor dog.

I think, in my head, Sookie came from the TV series True Blood..... The female lead character was called Sookie Stackhouse, and i kind of liked it.

The rest you can blame my cousin, Jo, and a work colleague, Ryan, for their inputs.

Anyone who has met Sookie will know, she's a dog very much, of two halves.

She's nervous, and barky, and timid, and highly strung.  She growls, and snarls and appears like a rabid animal.

She's muscular, robust, fast, bony, warm, sleepy.

On a lead she's a nightmare to walk.  You always have to keep your wits about you in case there are any other people, dogs, cats, squirrels, motorbikes......

Off the lead, in a pack, she's playful and funny, and dangerously fast.

She can sleep for England, once spent.  Don't be fooled, no matter how deep the sleep, the moment you move, she'll know.  I always suggest she sleeps with an eye open.

A lurcher.... black and tan, with amazing eyebrows, short haired, and a warm pigskin belly that hypnotizes her when tickled.

She's a hotpotch of breeds.... we are assured there's saluki, greyhound and whippet......  and her moods are as reliable and predictable as her confused breed would suggest.

She comes when she wants.  We regularly have stand-offs where she obstinately looks at us defying any and every request or command.

She is tough as old boots, but incredibly sensitive.

She's incredibly clever, and inestimably dopey.

She likes sheep, deer, squirrels,,,,,,

Yet, at home she is fine with our cat and our chickens..... I haven't introduced the chickens yet, either!

Confused?  Yes, we all are!!

Need to give two shout outs:

Lurcher Link - The charity from whence we got Sookie.

The Dog Father Huddersfield - our trusty dog walker (top marks for being brave with her)

tip run

 Since finishing at work and rehoming the best part of a decade of office based tat that i managed to accumulate.... when i say "tat" i am referring to the usual desk toys that you end up with....

items retrieved:

• A "this is fine" plush doll.
• A hydroponic kitchen garden.
• A dog crate.
• Some special paint.
• Assorted dog toys.
• A blue plastic nose flute.
• Screws, nails, bits of hardware that fell off stuff but you hung onto them in case you find something in desperate need of a bit of plastic that fell off a while ago.

You get the idea.

And so, having inherited a load of old office tat... i.e. new house tat..... something has to give, and to that end....

Since being at home more and spending more time "looking for work" (i am not playing "forge of empires" ten hours a day, honest), i've rescued the corner of our bedroom that i once called an office, and have decided it's time to swap my old computer chair for one of the two spare office chairs that reside in the "back room of doom".

So i duly chose the chair.... moved it upstairs to the office (it's bloody heavy, i can tell you that much) and i brought the old chair down with a view to wanging it unceremoniously in the garden, to die.

"let's have a quick trip down the tip" I offered to Dawn by way of midday amusement, and surprisingly, she accepted.  Took me ten minutes to remember my council login to check that the car was still registered with a "tip permit", and off we strode, on four wheels, down the tip.

Fifteen minutes to get there.  Twenty minutes queueing to get in.  Twenty seconds to junk the dismantled chair and a knackered old microwave. Twenty minutes drive home.

Now, call me a cynic, but THIS.... THIS is why people go fly-tipping, innit?

Over an hour to chuck some shit in a skip?

The feeling of satisfaction and a job well done was .... minor.

Here's an example of "office tat" that i retrieved.  A one eyed teddy bear that was rescued from a nearby street.  We always suspected that this thing was a corporate nanny-cam, and whenever we had anything confidential to discuss we'd turn this thing to face the wall.

weak end

I am starting to lose my frame of reference.

As Dawn doesn't work Mondays, and currently, neither do I..... well, Sunday has lost its grip.

I used to be clinging to the last vestiges of daylight, hoping that Sunday wouldn't slide over the horizon, into the Sun-night.... or should that be Moon-night?

Well.... now it doesn't matter..... the days all have equal value or lack of, depending on which side of the balance sheet you're rooted to.

Vegan and dry February though.... that's something.

I know I fell off the wagon yesterday with a post-walk brace of pints..... but largely this month represents something for me....

First - it's about getting back in touch with what we do - about shedding the passive consumerism that I/we tend to slip into, and focusing a little on what we buy/eat/drink.

Second, I kind of enjoy the challenge.

I'm gonna stop numbering things.....

I will be less heavy at the end of the month - i usually lose half a stone without trying.

Strangely - i've recently had a bad blood test and my cholesterol is too high, as is my risk of heart disease - i bet they say that to all the boys!  So, this month.... i have to have a "fasting" blood test which also includes a couple of days without alcohol.... easy!

Yin/Yang, karma, balance, black and white, good and evil..... if i had chakras they'd probably be realigning with every rice cake i consume this month.  It's all about balance.  I used to be a bit of a wrong-un and i always felt like i needed to balance bad things with good things and this is one small step for man.....

So.... I spent the day cooking.... you know.... cooking things entirely from scratch.

Roasting sweet potatoes for my chilli.

Baking potatoes.

Milking my mushrooms (almond milk of course)

Picking and chopping the stalks of an entire bunch of coriander. what a ballache.

But that's just it.... i feel a bit more intimate with the food already, and look, we're only two days in.

How do you know when your friend's a vegan?  They've already told you!

Sorry.

Here's a little picture of Dawn and Sookie, framed by a lovely holly bush and a drystone wall, on the Calderdale Way....

remember remember...

 .... the first of ... February.

Vegan and dry February to be precise.

To mark the end of January i drank the last draught from a post-holiday bottle of 7* Metaxa - it's been pretty glorious, but had to be finished before midnight, or i'd turn into a vegan or something....

I scoffed the last lump of stilton before veg-ebruary..... and had some pretty nice cheese dreams.

And now it's Feb.... and we've done a walk.

The tradition with these walks is that we have a pint, and as i don't drink in February i didn't have a drink, i had two.

The walk took us from Brighouse, along the canal to Red Brook, up into the fields and along Cromwell Wood to Southowram, before we descended back to the end of today's route.  It wasn't a long leg at about five and a half miles, but there was a hill and we went up it and came down it.....

a pylon in a field

A road

a different road

probably the same road but without a finger?

A car

another car and the ubiquitous carpet beater

The end... or the start, depending on which day it is.