Edna!

Once upon a time there was a tea-time quiz show.... I forget the name of the show in particular, based on the fact that it was quite a long time ago and my memory does tend to ignore such trivialities (sometimes!).

Anyhoo.....

This particular quiz show shall, in our household at least, be remembered for a particular contestant that appeared on it, and I believe her name was Edna, or Ethel, or Edith or something along those lines (not that I am suggesting in my generalisation that there are similarities in any of those names or the people who possess them, and of course, other girl's names are available)......

Ok, so to recap..... there was a Tea-time TV quiz show (name forgotten) and they had a contestant called (for argument's sake) Edna, and Edna had a strange affliction that rendered her incapable of turning her head to look at the screens and/or quiz show host.  In order that Edna COULD see what was going on she had to turn her whole upper body whilst keeping her neck rigid, and at each turn her shoulders moved with her head..... we found the whole thing quite amusing.

The reason I mention this?

Of course.... in the world of Karma it is said that "My Name is Earl Arctic Fox" - and for the last week, I've had a similar affliction to that of poor, dear, possibly for all I know, departed Edna!

It's not in the slightest bit funny now, is it?

"Question... Which fox now looks like an idiot?

buzz....

"Yes, Arctic Fox for the School of Hard Knocks.... what's the answer?"

The Arctic Fox turns his whole body, stiffly, and painfully sideways, to look down the lens of the camera with a red light on top of it, and looking like a public information film about the effects of whiplash speaks softly to the viewers.....

"Erm..... that'll be me then!"

"Yes, Arctic Fox, you're quite right...... ten points to Gryffindor"

Shoot me now....

Dreary.... dull, wet, and extremely windy..... and the weather is just as bad!

I've got an abscess, and I have to take this staggering amount of antibiotics.  It took me a few hours just to work out the schedule to take these antibiotics.

I'm going into no gory detail about said abscess, suffice to say, if monkeys WERE to shove bad nuts there, they'd find that they would quite quickly become ex-monkeys quicker than they could say "Davy Jones".

For example:-

Flucloxacillin (a whopping 500mg variety) - Take ONE four times a day, an hour before food or on an empty stomach (which means one hour before food or at least two hours after food) and to take them with plenty of water.

Metronidazole (200mg) - Take ONE three times a day, with or after food.  Avoid alcohol like the plague.

So I have had to set up a series of alarms on my phone that tell me when to eat, when to breathe and most importantly which tablet to take at which point in the day.... it gets to be awfully confusing.  Coupled with the fact that I don't, as a rule eat "normal" meals in the day time, and I like a drink or three...... it's hard work.

Side effects of such large doses of antibiotics are "unpredictable" to say the least....  They tend to go in one end and come out of the other in very quick succession.

So I'm stuck in a loop.... timer goes beep, I respond like Pavlov's incontinent dog!  They tell me it's all in a good cause..... let's bloody hope so because the alternative path of having the abscess excised or drained and the subsequent round of daily dressing changes is not an option I wish to consider.

Stir crazy.

They say that the first step toward recovery, is admitting that you've got a problem.

My Sims2 confessional has perhaps triggered some sort of turnaround.

Last night, I had two strange dreams. The first dream was about the late, great, Tommy Cooper, and how I had somehow managed to get hold of this really brilliant joke of his, and actually improved upon it. I woke myself up laughing, but alas could not remember the joke, nor the cunning revision of it.

The second dream was a bit more odd.

I once spent a few weeks in France, and by the end of it was actually dreaming in French. I guess that's significant, as last night I dreamt in Simspeak!! It's a nonsensical language, and to wake oneself up by speaking "in tongues" is decidedly unsavoury.

I went for a twenty mile bike ride today instead!! I only fell off four times. My back aches, my head aches, my legs ache, my stomach aches, and of course..... the old derriere, it goes without saying!!

Believe it or not, I found a feature on my phone that lets me take three pictures, and then the phone turns them into a panorama... my first effort is here!



Update: This is not Black Moss Reservoir. This is the feeder reservoir above Scammonden Dam - the one that the M62 is built on. This is Deanhead Reservoir. Black moss is four miles due south of here!!

Spice: Who the hell is Who Flung Dung?

Re: Phone's ability to produce a panorama - I can spot a couple of glaring errors!!

Shopping....

To take three ladies to a shopping centre is not the wisest thing a man can do.

Admittedly, I also had shopping to do, and am renowned as quite a good shopper myself. Unfortunately after a mere seven hours in said shopping centre, I must admit, the time has come to hang my shopping boots up in shame.

Let me just say that I thought the word "renowned" should be spelled "reknowned" - Can anyone clarify whether this is right or wrong?

In other news, something I have been threatening to do for a while, has actually come into being today. I have started a completely new blog to highlight my random shopping theme. Go have a look and leave some comments and stuff - Random Shopping!

Trying to get in the mood...

This week, I will be mostly trying to get in the christmas mood.

The vast majority of my christmas shopping is done.... only a final foray into the world of shopper's heaven, tomorrow, can lay this beast to rest.

I've watched Polar Express (pass the puke bucket), and It's a Wonderful Life (to which I sobbed loudly). It would appear that my trusty copy of "The Muppets' Christmas Carol" has long since vanished, and I am sad about this.

I've downloaded Nat King Cole's christmas numbers, and listened to some of them.

The presents I HAVE bought, are all wrapped and labelled, neath the festive tree that I have assembled.

The bits to "make and do" are mostly made and done, and I've completely bust my back assembling a specific item today, which I obviously cannot name.

I've eaten christmas cake, and mince pies with brandy butter.

Rather than feeling like St. Nick himself, I am still not getting the joy of christmas. It's just not working. My bank balance is dwindling, and the back spasms are really not helping. I am still feeling like Uncle Ebeneezer.

This year, I have coins in the oven, ready for unsuspecting carol singers.... Oh the joy!!

Ouch!

Firstly, happy birthday to my sister!!

Secondly, unhappy backday to me!!

Woke up this morning, and couldn't even move. Not good. Day off work sick as a result. As the day's gone on, the back has of course eased up. Let's see if it still feels ok in the morning. Baths help a lot, but only while I am in them. I hardly got ANY sleep at all last night, because every time I turned over, the pain woke me up.

I need to tackle my mountain of paperwork, and my mountain of outstanding Pogo badges!!

Why is there never enough time to do the mundane things that need doing, which would free up some quality leisure time?? I guess this is why they call it the rat-race!!

Oh, and in other news, I finally lost my ring for good - you may remember I lost it temporarily last week, but it turned up again. This time it ain't coming back. I lost it in the end of a giant water chute, in seven feet of murky sticking plaster infested chlorine.

Bugger!!