Gnu

It's a new moon.  Happy new moon everyone!

As for my state of mind at the moment, I'm all over the place.

Opened the pub yesterday...... closed the pub yesterday...... worked a shift at the pub yesterday...... couldn't sleep.....  Dawn started snoring..... the rain started pouring........ my back started hurting.......  restless night to the power of ten.

Today I have to open the pub..... close the pub, and make sure the new real ales are all tapped and ready to go for the weekend.... I think I'll tap the Martson's Pedigree tonight to put on the bar tomorrow and tap the Kelham Island on Friday night so it's ready to replace something at the weekend.  The new Copper Dragon will arrive Friday and that'll just follow itself on the bar when it runs off and the Leeds Pale, well, unless I get some stillage space, it'll have to wait.  I need a Bateman's XB drinker to walk through the door!

It's enough to keep me awake at night!

I eventually got round to making a lovely salad yesterday to take to the pub for my tea.....  I julienned carrots, diced peppers, boiled eggs, tore lettuce, chopped spring onions, sliced radishes, deseeded cucumber, and generally mixed it all together........ then promptly dropped it all on the kitchen floor!

If Jesus wept, he couldn't hold a candle to what I did!!

As we all know, the 8 second rule doth verily apply, and I scooped it up quickly, leaving the last few dog hair coated pieces for the sweeping brush.

Once I'd tipped some bacon bits (vegetarian ones of course) and Italian dressing over the top, you'd never know of the salad's close encounter of the linoleum kind!

And Lord, the salad was good!

Right.... time to get ready and get down the boozer for some opening up type antics..... a barsteward's work is never done!

(just got time to pay tribute to Brian at Tannu Tuva for reminding me how good Squeeze are - in homage, I've changed my music - go on have a go on the music player over there on the right hand side)

Tinker....

Tinkering with my widgets.

I know I shouldn't but I'll just do it until I need glasses!

After a rather late and stressful bar shift last night, I'm left feeling a little flat today.

I was hoping I might rise late, have a bite to eat, pack some fishing gear and head out to charm a fish or two out of a local fishing hole, known, rather imaginatively, as the "Duck Pond" at Lindley.

Of course the British summer has other ideas, and it's possibly the wettest morning I've seen since I lived in Outlane, some seven or eight years.

So, I've been tinkering.

I've changed the "chicken" tune to one the is more suited to our current situation, and I've uploaded a few couple more webcam highlights.  Don't forget to click on the arrow, on the right, under where it says "music player" to hear my latest selection.

There's a definite "weather" and "ducks" theme running through the air today!

The tune in question is dedicated to my late cousin Dan - It's a track by a band called Lemon Jelly and I'm pretty sure you'll be able to guess its name.  I remember the twinkle in Dan's eye when he told us about this track.  I'd heard it before but didn't know what the heck it was.  Anyway, this is an "unplugged" version of that tune and I'd give anything to be playing it to Dan and imagining him dragging out, not only this version, but every other version that has ever been released and quite a few that haven't as well.  He was an avid, obsessive compulsive, collector.

The stress at work was caused by a lack of customers......  between the hours of half past eight and ten o' clock, the pub was empty..... I cleaned and tidied, wiped and dried, mopped and stacked, rinsed and wrung..... until there wasn't a surface left that I could tackle.

Bored by the inactivity, I had a go on the quiz machine and was almost in "cash winning" mode when a single solitary customer walked in.....  rats!  I think he had half a lager and went to pick up some salt and pepper chips.  Lucky lad!

I got another seven or eight customers that came in and stayed until closing time.

I managed to clock up one complaint about my music choice in the pub (the trouble with "compilation" albums is that there's always one or two tracks that you don't like, and the landlandy happened to walk into the bar at one of those moments - even I don't like the track, but if you had a jukebox there'd always be someone who'd put the Wombles on or something right?).  I could write a bit more about this "music" thing.... perhaps another day?

At 2:30AM I woke up with more "window" fever!!  Did I check the windows?  Knowing full well that I did!

Tinker.....

Tinker, tailor, soldier, procrastinator!

My car's broken......  not only is it broken, but the required part is not available until the seventeenth of July, and that's slightly over a month away..... when they said "one month next Sunday", I don't think anybody was laughing.

The particular part that's broken is a spring..... they make the wheels go up and down into the potholes that the council leave for us.

Now this spring is a special spring.....  you can only use a spring manufactured by the original car manufacturer because it's so rare that nobody else would want to make it.  The spring only fits my particular model and only those of that particular model that were made in that particular year!

It's a "one off" and I presume the original car manufacturer are manufacturing the part on that basis..... there is no stock of it.

So, I'm housebound..... which is less painful than it might originally sound in comparison to being egg-bound!

I'm wishing to be fishing!

So, I've spent a little bit of time getting back to my blogger template...... I've resurrected the "music player" featurette and also have paved the way for a future re-release of the ever popular "bowling cam" widget.... so keep your eyes peeled over on the right hand side of my page for when THAT goes live!

The "music player" function is a nice simple affair.... and I've (rather against my usual style) made sure that the player doesn't automatically start, which could result in heart failure for any number of blog visitors who have their sound turned up too high and have yet to be notified.... and it shouldn't piss you off too much because now YOU.... yes YOU....  You sat there in your vest and pants, slobbering your cornflakes all over the keyboard...... can start and stop the music at will...... I will probably change the tune weekly or so, in order to give you a chance to have a listen should you so wish.  If you look on the right hand side under the "bowling cam" there's a little arrow.... if you click that it will play some music.... if you click it again it won't play some music....  even YOU can manage that!

* [edit] - Apologies to those of a nervous disposition for my first choice of "music" - it sums up my dark mood and reminds me that if Armageddon were coming down the road, it would be accompanied by this excellent track..... one of the best gigs I ever went to blah blah blah.....
** [edit] - Cheryl Cole has now replaced my music of choice!  Blame Yorkshire Pudding for that one!

Bowling cam is another matter all together!

I've lost both of my webcams!  As soon as I find one of them, OR as soon as I find a really cheap, nasty, horrible, low quality piece of plastic that purports to be a webcam..... it will be up and running.

To make these little doo-hickeys do what they're intended to do..... I've had to install my own little web server..... so the stuff you'll see is actually coming to you live(ish) and sort of directly from the computer in my bedroom..... and of course if you're not seeing or hearing anything, then I've switched my computer off or my house has burnt down and you should call for a fire brigade or something......

And so, this merely proves that point that..... 

"one man's car part is another man's web server" - (Confucius)

Huzzah!!

Thanks to spice-the-cat, I am now a music bearing blog again. You may or may not be happy about that, but after a heck of a lot of jiggery-pokery I have managed to bastardise the "skydrive" file service into my flash mp3 player over there on the right hand side... see?? You learn something new every day!!

I didn't yet get chance to apologise properly to everyone for my absence as both a reader AND a writer!! In light of the sheer volume of backlogged blog posts that I need to read to catch up with everyone, I may have to set some serious time aside!!

Rol: Thanks for those kind words.... Yes, Dead Man's Shoes is a great film. It's a long time since I saw a movie that actually "changed" me in some way.... I certainly didn't feel like I was the same person that I was before I had seen the film, after I had seen the film, if you know what I mean?!?

I must update the "movies I have watched" section of my blog with as many of them as I can now remember.

Normal service is S L O W L Y being resumed!!

Amazing.

A random music robbing spree.......

I love to get music for free..... it's not something everyone agrees with.

On a quest to find an album for my "ladyfriend" this evening......

I start to download this album - it's a double - forty tracks!!!

I think it's just rude to take forty tracks from someone and not even say hello.

We chat a while and swap some music ideas.... likes and dislikes.... that sort of thing......

Then he tells me about this!!!

Erik Mongrain - Playing guitar in a style called "airtapping".

I like it, and that's a positive to stealing music!!

(Don't forget to stop my media player over there on the right hand side before playing this video otherwise you'll be MC'ing a whole heap of noise!!)

Desert Island Discs.

Well, I have finally managed to get around to it.

For a couple of days, every spare moment I have, has been given over to the deepest soul searching for this piece. I desperately wanted to avoid simply picking records that I like, and tried to pick ones that I would actually need to live, and that mean something extra.

And so, I give to you, my desert island discs.

The concept, if you have been under a rock for the last sixty five years, is quite simple. You have to imagine you are a castaway on a desert island, of course!! You are permitted eight pieces of music. You may also take one book (you are automatically assigned a copy of the Bible, and the Complete Works of William Shakespeare). You are also allowed one luxury item.

Thus:

The first piece I have selected, is a piece of techno. The tune’s called “Plastic Dreams” and it’s by "JayDee". It’s a great rumbling tune, and it so reminds me of better times, and better places. Those heady, carefree days of reckless abandon, at the Ark in Leeds, at the Orbit in Morley. Listening to this and dancing round my desert island would give me the memories I would need to survive.

The second piece I have chosen is a classical romp. I’m a little surprised at myself for picking this, but it’s a tune I love and it dances like sunbeams whenever I hear it. Rossini’s Overture to La Gazza Ladra (The thieving magpie) - Maestoso marziale. Oh the snare drums!!

My third piece is more dance music, and I’ve chosen this track simply because it represents so many other tracks that I could have chosen. It’s a track called "Swords" and it comes from the mighty "Leftfield". I couldn’t live without something as positively sublime as this track. It never fails to raise my serotonin levels.

My fourth track would undoubtedly have to be "The Beloved", with their witty little ditty "Hello". A host of name checks, and clever rhymes, with some great early synth sounds…. How could I possibly leave this at home?

And on to my fifth. I hark right back to my good old metal days. Surely I have room for a metal track? But which one…. Oh Christ, there are so many. It’s gotta be Black Sabbath surely? A soft one? A hard one? Oh, I am in a pickle now!! Ok, stick a pin in the map, and it comes out – "Black Sabbath", and the fuzziest, thrashingest tune from the Never Say Die album…. I bring to you….. "Shock Wave". I couldn’t live on an island, knowing that I would never hear those tortured guitars, and Ozzy’s fantastic vocals again.

Lord, that was a hard choice. I guess it’s getting a little bit more difficult now.

Sixth choice – Well, this one’s easy, how could I go there without the "Beastie Boys" to back me up? I’m gonna take their lovely bubbling track "Alive"…. But in true Fox style, I’m gonna kill two birds with one egg, and take the Moby remix!! Perfect beach music.

Seventh tune. This record was given to me by a friend of my mum’s. He knew I was getting into "Jimi Hendrix" when I was younger, and made a generous donation. He presented me with an original seven inch pressing of “All along the Watchtower” from the very year that I was born. He also introduced me to Humble Pie and Montrose, but I just don’t think I have room for them.

And finally (drum roll please) The piece that would hold my emotional state together more than anything. Inspiration to ambient artists, and dance music alike, "Terry Riley" gives me "A Rainbow In Curved Air". Minimalist, vivid, colourful, and beautiful. Buried treasure for my island.

Well, that was quite emotionally draining. I am happy with all the tracks that I am taking with me, but it breaks my heart to leave so many behind. No room for Saxon, Iron Maiden, The Clash, The Dead Kennedys, and too many other things to mention.

The book – It hasn’t taken me more than a minute to decide on this. It’s a book I once started to read, but found it too time consuming to finish. I would love the opportunity to not only finish, but reread – Bill Bryson’s "A Short History of Nearly Everything".

My luxury…. I guess a blowup doll would be unacceptable as a luxury, mainly because it could be used as a flotation device, and hence would be viewed as something which could aid my escape. I do know they allowed someone to take unlimited champagne though, but I don’t really want alcohol. The geek in me is saying “Swiss Army knife, you idiot” and I don’t think I should disagree.

That's why I've got....

.... Friday on my mind!

I'm sure that's a song.... Possibly by Gary Moore??? I am usually quite good at these things, but the week has taken such a toll on my mental capacity, that I am unable to even process it.

I'm looking forward to the weekend..... But I don't even know why.

I have loads of stuff to do at my house. The lawn needs cutting, and I have even bought a new lawnmower to take care of this arduous task. My bedroom is a pigsty. A courier is coming tomorrow to take away my shoddy televisual equipment. I have Pogo badges galore, to distract me from the real world issues that need tackling.

And so, you can see, there's nothing slightly interesting or exciting planned... Just a bit of ME time.

Ok, ok, I have had my first sip of coffee at work now, and before you all start commenting and starting a massive debate about the song.... I guess it's a Gary Moore song that I had mixed up with a Cure song in my tiny fragile mind - There's a line of shovels against the wall.... Take your pick!! Confused?? You will be.... Right after this!! Ah, the memories of Soap!!

A big, hearty, pat on the back to my good friend spice-the-cat for correctly identifying Mory Kante as my new blog tune - I effing love this song, and although Ahm doesn't like it (which is a shame), I am going to leave it here for a little while longer at least.

I just got given a half gigabyte memory stick at work for a ridiculous sketch that occured, involving a discussion with someone at the end of the office (about timesheets), which was conducted by us shouting to each other.... What a strange place to work!! I'm well chuffed, and am frantically stuffing loads of my mp3s on it to take home with me. I have just surprised myself with the fact that I currently have 11Gb of mp3s on the computer at work!!

Amongst my 11Gb of mp3s are: The Wurzels - Top of the Crops; Chas & Dave - The Very Best of; Daft Punk; New Order; Roger Sanchez; Jeff Mills (playing techno beats to a live philharmonic orchestra!!!!); Voivod; LFO (thanks Hodgy); KLF; and a zillion other generic dance compilations.

And so, maybe I'll get a pint of Guinness to ease me into the weekend.... who knows.

Let's hope it's a good one for everyone!!