Friday, April 20, 2012


I get pissed off when chains of events conspire against me..... case in question......

A friend gave me a computer.  I want to plug the computer into my television so I can surf the internet, in large screen mode.... from the comfort of my sofa.  Not a difficult request really.

I installed Windows XP on the computer - a series of problems meant that this process in itself took a whole day!!  The computer has been working, but it has hiccoughed a couple of times, but I thought I had ironed these problems out.

I check my TV and it doesn't have a VGA connector on it to connect a PC.... groans..... the PC doesn't have an HDMI connector on it to connect it to the TV..... double groans...... there's got to be a way to do this..... I can't find the instruction book for the television.... I can't find the model number of the television to find an instruction manual for the television on the internet...... 

Reluctantly I lift the entire TV cabinet which holds (TV; Freeview HDR; Nintendo Wii; PS3; DVD Player; Wireless router; DJ hero controller; All the associated plugs, wires and bits and pieces that go with it) - I drag the unit out just far enough that all the cables and plugs get tangled up and just far enough that I can get a camera down the back to take some photographs......

I sift through a series of terrible photographs that I've blindly taken down the back of the TV and find one that when I zoom in close enough, I can read the model number of the television......

I look up the television on the internet and find an instruction booklet for the correct model.... it requires some software to be installed to read it though and I give up.....

I am just emailing my friend to see what he thinks..... when I remember I had bought a VGA to RGB H/V cable for my laptop, some time ago, and it's right here in the cupboard in front of me.... I dig it out.  It's the FIRST thing to go right today!!

I run all the cables through the right holes in the cabinet, thread this one here, pull that one through there - it's turning from a tidy, cable managed nirvana into the cable knitting fairy's hideout!!  Everything's hanging out.... bits here, bits there..... but everything's plugged in..... I switch it on...... 

Nothing.... blank screen......

I unplug everything, plug it all back in..... and..... a different shade of nothing..... a BLACK screen.......

I switch off and on again like a seasoned IT professional and......

beeeep..... beeeep....... beeeeeeep........ a motherboard sounds its last dying breaths........

I should...
a) go back to bed.
b) smash something.
c) put everything back the way it was before i started pissing about with it.
d) blame it on the dog.
e) all of the above)

delete as applicable!

I consult my download schedule and notice "Day of the Jackal" has just about arrived...... looks like that's the plan then.


  1. as a side note - in putting everything back, I managed to squash and shatter my telephone extension box inbetween the tv unit and the wall.... christ on a bike..... it really IS smash-something-o-clock now

  2. Ha! Ha! This is what it's really like living in our digital-broadband, user friendly, technologically enhanced world! By the way most men I know were born with VGA connectors. Have you seen a specialist? It's amazing what surgeons can do these days.

  3. All of the above! I don't think modern technology likes you! ;P

  4. and therein lies the irony of the story - 5 years out of the business and technology's given up on me..... what to do??? what to do???? anyone need a sherpa???

  5. People talk about how much time computers save us - I reckon they waste twice as much.

  6. Rol you're quite right.... well your "twice as much" might be slightly UNDERestimating..... take into account that computers ONLY save time when you're adding something up or typing a document.... and subtract all time spent procrastinating then they probably cost us a LOT more!!

  7. I WILL say one good thing about computers this week though - I have started using Mozilla Thunderbird for email and blog reading - it works VERY WELL - huzzah!! It DOES save time!