Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Implosion.

I am writing this, yesterday. Today I am going to the dentist (which of course is tomorrow), and then I think I am going out in the afternoon, so I probably won't get the required time to devote to the following blog entry.

In advance of today, I give you tomorrow's blog entry, yesterday.

It's all about the searches (AGAIN) - Sorry.

* crown green bowling (Google)
* bowling cam (Google)

Of course, you've come to the right place. My bedroom overlooks the crown green bowling green of Outlane Bowling Club. You can see the zen-like action here! Also, you may wish to view the amazing highlights section, here. I am THRILLED that someone found me by searching for "bowling cam". I hope they were not disappointed.

* pictures of an artic fox (drawed and phtographs) (Google)
* were does a arctic fox live (Google)
* arctic foxs (Google)
* artic fox (Google)
* arctic compared to dessert foxes (Google)

I don't like to pick fault with people's spelling and grammar, and you knew there was a huge BUT to follow that sentence didn't you? But, the above examples both amuse and frustrate me equally.
a) "drawed and phtographs" I need not comment. They even spelled it "artic" to add insult to my injury. Very salty wounds.
b) It's "where" not "were" and "an" not "a", but thanks for spelling "arctic" correctly. An arctic fox (not "a arctic fox") lives in the Arctic. The clue is in the question.
c) Plural of fox is foxes. Pertaining to a fox is fox's. You're in no-mans-land with "foxs"!! I am becoming more and more pedantic as I get older!! I also appreciate that it makes no difference to a search engine, but what kind of example is that to set?
d) It's arCtic not artic!! "Artic fox" is still the most common search term that brings people flailing through my portal.
e) Never eat dessert foxes, they are extremely rare!

* noodle doodle mouses (Google)
* noodle doodle came to town (Google)
* Download If I had words to make a day for you (Google)
* an ant riding round on a golf ball songs lyrics (sing book 2005)(ant) (Google)

Lyrics that people look for. I am VERY pleased that my seemingly random rendition of the noodle doodle song has yielded visitors. The lyrics to "If I had words to make a day for you" are actually from a song called "If I had words" - Adapted from "Symphony No. 3" by Camille Saint-Saens (as featured in the film Babe) see: Lyrics or video. As for an "ant riding round on a golf ball", I am guessing you mean this?

* How Heaney portrays nature in his poem Blackberry picking (Google)
* "oh mother come and meet me now" (Google)

I am pleased that people come to my blog in search of information about poetry. My recent excursion to Black Moss Reservoir was of course poetry inspired. I was thinking about Seamus Heaney whilst picking blackberries at the weekend. The other poem was one I searched for forever, and was eventually rewarded.... you can read about it here - It's called "Skyman", and someone wrote about it in the comments for the blog entry.

* "shit on glass" (Google)

I sincerely hope you were looking for the Andy Goldsworthy "Cow shit on glass" exhibit and not some sort of dirty process!! Suffice to say, I give you the former, here: The latter, I cannot help you with.

* Wainwrights Castle Cragg (Google)
* google earth catbells (Google)

I shall be walking both of these hills, this coming weekend, in anticipation of my forthcoming birthday. I did give links to the Google Earth downloads for these files before, but here they are again.

* what do baby goldfinches look like? (Google)

Unfortunately, although I have them in my garden, the pictures I tried to take are not very good. If I can find one that seems remotely bearable, I'll put it here to look at. Well, here you go, it's the best I can provide of my own shots.


* baby arctic foxes for sale (Google)
* pet arctic fox for sale (Google)

Arctic Foxes, like any wild animal, DO NOT make good pets. Do not attempt to own one!! Stop looking here to see if you can own me too!!

* slutsuzie blackpool (Google)
* slut suzie blackpool (Google)

I think Suzie disappeared some time ago now. I am amazed that I still, regularly, get a good number of people who come here looking for her because I once wrote about her. She was a prostitute in Blackpool, and I believe she specialised in attending to disabled clients and the older gentleman. I could be wrong, it was a long time ago.

* "No time off for good behaviour" "movie quote" (Google)

This is interesting. I don't know why someone would come to my page looking for movie quotes, but I always like to give something back. Here's my thing. That's your quote searched for right there!! Of course, if the answer isn't actually in that list, then perhaps it aint that much of a big thing, but the IMDB quote search engine isn't bad. A freebie from me to you.

I live to give!!

PS: Post update post update: Don't forget me hearties!!

5 comments:

  1. Only you would have to time to write today's blog yesterday!
    Making the rest of us feel guiltier for not making time to write today's today!
    Pol x

    ReplyDelete
  2. You've inspired me to go and make yesterday's breakfast tomorrow to save time.

    Chez Stan, the search term that has amused me most recently is "mcfly are rubbish compared to arctic monkeys".

    I don't think you need the Internet to work that out.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Never complain about other people's spelling and grammar and then make a faux pas yourself as soon as you've just done it.

    Hug but, indeed. Freudian slip?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I felt like I was whirring around in a time machine as I read the beginning of your post. :)

    Hey! Can I interest you in a beautiful female orange tabby cat? Heck, you can even name her Jasmine!

    Although the point is moot because I. AM. NOT. KEEPING. HER. I couldn't name her Jasmine because my husband's best friend already named his cat Jasmine.

    (Ok now I've gone and confused myself!)

    -JEn

    ReplyDelete
  5. Spice it's so bloody obvious that that is why you don't do what I said I shouldn't do for the very reason that you pointed out.

    It WAS a time vortex and that's my excuse!!

    I am a dick!!

    FoX

    ReplyDelete